Like clockwork every single year, as soon the New Year’s celebrations are over, everyone begins asking what’s your New Year’s resolution? If we’re being honest, most of the time our answers fall into one of three categories:
Although these are good and important areas to keep in mind throughout the year, they often times are the same kind of resolution we made the year before. They are also some of the top three things we think about on a daily basis, so there isn’t much weight to them.
And when people’s plans don’t follow the exact path they thought it would, they become discouraged and don’t want to continue or even try anymore. Hence the reason thousands of people fail with their New Year’s resolution in the first couple of weeks of the New Year.
So instead of picking one of the same old resolutions done year after year, I decided to make an effort to make resolutions that aren’t necessarily measurable in one big heap at the end of next year like weight, money, or travel. But over the course of the entire year, these resolutions will make my view of the world and my view of myself change in small incrimites until I don’t even remember how I use to be.
Learn to Let Things Go
This is one resolution that I am guilty of as anyone. Maybe even more so. Having had a very rough experience throughout my undergraduate degree, both in terms of my health and the people surrounding me, I have held on to a lot of feelings about that time. Because of that, I sometimes end up releasing my frustrations in rants about things that happened several years ago.
For this year one of my big goals is to move past all of it. And not just my undergraduate experience, but anything that is not beneficial to me. Yes, it is terrible when difficult things happen to people, but unless there is a way you are being proactive to change the situation, you should not dwell on things that are no longer in your control or even a true issue for you any longer.
When driving a car it’s more important to look at where you are going, instead of where you’ve been. Start living for the now and appreciating what is happening right in front of you. If you keep looking back at what has already passed, you will only cause more problems for yourself in the future.
Stop all Judgement
Judging others around me has thankfully never been a problem I have truly struggled with, but I am definitely guilty of being my harshest critic. I often times find myself thinking I’m not doing enough. I’m not good enough. Why bother in the first place?
This year I want to ask myself “if” a lot more.
If I saw myself on the street, what would I actually think?
If I were a professor or boss, what would I actually think of me as a student or worker?
If I was someone else, what would my view be of how I am doing?
This is not because I want to pay attention to how others view me but instead look at myself from an objective point of view. Looking at yourself more objectively for a change can often help make a huge difference and help to silence those little voices in your head telling you “you aren’t good enough” and allow you to look towards the positives.
To the same degree, don’t let others judgments effect you. You are your own person and at the end of the day what really matters is how you view and feel about yourself.
Become Aware of Your Negativity
I know it can be incredibly hard to do, especially with the stress of everyday life, but this year try to keep tabs on your negativity. Negativity tends to fester like an open wound, and although you might feel great releasing all your feelings in one big explosion, what benefits does this actually have for you.
Looking towards the positive in things has not only been proven to improve your overall mood, but causes less conflict, reduces stress, and makes for a more fulfilling life.
Even though there are things in your day to day life that can cause a negative reaction and make you upset like that driver who cuts you off or a person who did better on a project than you, what does that matter in the long run? Did the driver cutting you off cause you to be any more than a few seconds late to where you were going? Did the person who did better on a project cause you to fail with your project?
Although it’s okay to get upset, don’t let these thoughts grow in your mind and ruin other opportunities that will come your way to be happy. If you become obsessed with the negatives in life not only will others views of you turn towards the negative as well, but your own view of yourself and the world in general will continue this downward spiral. This year, try acknowledging these feelings for a moment and then forgetting about them. It is about you and you shouldn’t be letting any other person drag you down.
For the New Year, keep your goals high on your daily to-do list! Also let me know in the comments below, what your goals are and how you are planning on reaching them.